where am i going?

I am truly confused. In the midst of all the work, studies and trying to make appointments for things, to missing home and family and friends, I'm uncertain where I'm going.

When you are tired, you go to sleep.
When you are hungry, you eat.
When you are dirty, you shower.
When you are bored, you find activities to do.
When you are lonely, you call your friends out.
When you feel it's too quiet, you turn the tv or the radio on.
When you feel like it's time for some music, you put your favorite tunes on.
BUT, when you are lost in life, what do you do ?

Obviously as a christian, you turn back to God.

To know that one needs God is just head knowledge. How do you implant it in the heart so that it'll always be there? Or are we humans so forgetful that we need constant reminders and challenges to remind us how much we need God ?
How desperate we are for Him and not vice versa?
Why oh why are we so blinded by the fact that it's that way?
Why do we procrastinate and say, there is time later? Or better yet, I don't have time now, I'm too busy?
Is God that unimportant to us that we leave Him for the last bits?
Imagine if God say, well, there's lots of time to love you, I'll leave that till the end, left us out in the cold and dark world.

I am so truly unworthy of His love, yet He is still there.
The shepherd that waits for that abandons all other sheeps just to look for that one sheep. Each time. Never angry. Always patient.

Aahh. If only.

If only it could sink into my heart, and remain there forever.