Similar title to the previous. I know. However, I just wanted to blog about my weekend. The pics will be up soon I promise. As soon as I'm able to load it off my friend's camera.
This christmas, I was in Chicago, windiest city in the world. Not with family, not with regular friends, not in church, not alone either. I was with new found friends, whose company i thoroughly enjoy. It's weird. I dreaded coming because I thought I would be alone. Funny how Malaysians mesh so easily so quickly.
Chicago was a blast mainly because the place was beautiful. It had BEAUTIFUL buildings. Each had its own character, built differently, each trying to outdo or outshow each other. I felt as if I was walking through a dream. Too bad I didn't have my own camera. Or else, I would have certainly shot more photos.
Because of that trip to Chicago, I really want to come to the states. Talk about the deer that enters the village. So struck and dazed by the lights. I hope sooner or later, I won't get hit by the truck with the bright lights.
I wonder if I do start working in a big city, whether one day I would ponder and wonder how it would be like to be in a small place again?
Merry Christmas everyone, albeit a late one.
Wednesday, December 27, 2006
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
christmas and new year
Ah. Christmas. I used to love this time of the year, or rather, I used to love this time of the year MORE. I guess the prospects of being far away from people familiar is sad. Although I have to say, that the people in Indiana are fun to hang out with, and I enjoy going out with them. Really easy to get along with. So hopefully, it won't be such a bad last week.
New year was more of what I wanted to talk about albeit the fact that christmas is closer. The coming of the new year was always like a fresh start for me. New resolutions, time to start things properly again. I was a firm believer in fresh starts, and was always happy to have a new chance at doing things right. That's why, initially for many years, I was happy to move out of some place. Due to the fact I wasn't all too popular with people at times, it was nice to be able to just escape and not have to face these people ever again.
Yes. I was a coward. I ran. Ran away from all my problems instead of facing them. For a while there I had been good, and didn't try eluding my troubles.
Now, it's so much so, I don't even bother to think of things to improve myself on in 2007. Honestly, I'm just too tired and I lack the energy to carry out such cumbersome tasks of thinking of areas os weaknesses and correcting it.
Am I the only odd one out or does everyone else feel that, resolutions are useless? Haha.
My only resolution this year (if I were to make one) is to be true to myself.
And not to procrastinate. (oops... over'd my quota)
New year was more of what I wanted to talk about albeit the fact that christmas is closer. The coming of the new year was always like a fresh start for me. New resolutions, time to start things properly again. I was a firm believer in fresh starts, and was always happy to have a new chance at doing things right. That's why, initially for many years, I was happy to move out of some place. Due to the fact I wasn't all too popular with people at times, it was nice to be able to just escape and not have to face these people ever again.
Yes. I was a coward. I ran. Ran away from all my problems instead of facing them. For a while there I had been good, and didn't try eluding my troubles.
Now, it's so much so, I don't even bother to think of things to improve myself on in 2007. Honestly, I'm just too tired and I lack the energy to carry out such cumbersome tasks of thinking of areas os weaknesses and correcting it.
Am I the only odd one out or does everyone else feel that, resolutions are useless? Haha.
My only resolution this year (if I were to make one) is to be true to myself.
And not to procrastinate. (oops... over'd my quota)
Saturday, December 16, 2006
emptiness
No real words to describe how hollow we can be inside. When surrounded in this world, we think all external things satisfy, but truly, it only does for such a short while. How many times have we tried to substitute something eternal with something so contemporary?
It's unfortunate that we are so short sighted. It's unfortunate that I have such vision which can't be corrected by mere glasses.
Day after day, in all the mistake I make, I question, how can some being, so holy so perfect, ever love someone like me? And in my sin I continue sinning, just because sometimes, I feel there's no use turning around, because I'm such a sinner. Just like with people, when you do something they don't like, you're not in their circle of friends anymore, or the quarrels even sometimes relatives have among each other, then they don't speak to each other for years.
Like a disobedient son that has angered the father so much, there's so much confusion as to what to do next.
Sometimes, I cannot comprehend the value that God sees in me, and that despite and in spite of all I do, I am still loved. He has given so much, forgiven so much, yet in my sinning sometimes I so forget to turn back. It gives me the feeling of being so ungrateful, but even then, God continues to forgive. Will this ever run out? His love? Hopefully not. I need more and more of it each day.
It's unfortunate that we are so short sighted. It's unfortunate that I have such vision which can't be corrected by mere glasses.
Day after day, in all the mistake I make, I question, how can some being, so holy so perfect, ever love someone like me? And in my sin I continue sinning, just because sometimes, I feel there's no use turning around, because I'm such a sinner. Just like with people, when you do something they don't like, you're not in their circle of friends anymore, or the quarrels even sometimes relatives have among each other, then they don't speak to each other for years.
Like a disobedient son that has angered the father so much, there's so much confusion as to what to do next.
Sometimes, I cannot comprehend the value that God sees in me, and that despite and in spite of all I do, I am still loved. He has given so much, forgiven so much, yet in my sinning sometimes I so forget to turn back. It gives me the feeling of being so ungrateful, but even then, God continues to forgive. Will this ever run out? His love? Hopefully not. I need more and more of it each day.
I can only imagine
What it will be like
When I walk
By Your side
I can only imagine
What my eyes will see
When Your face
Is before me
I can only imagine
Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
Will I dance for You Jesus or in awe of You be still
Will I stand in Your presence or to my knees will I fall
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
When that day comes
And I find myself
Standing in the Son
I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever
Forever worship You
I can only imagine
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
updates
I am here in Indianapolis, Indiana. Finally, all those months of correspondence and getting my applications in, I am finally here. I have not really been around the city very much, but to me, this appears to be the kind of city I'd rather be in (provided I don't get mugged) (Haha. Sorry Deb, this is an indirect insult to Halifax, just in case you didn't catch it).
The one thing I'm seriously SERIOUSLY in love with is the hospital. IT IS HUGE. And all the cases in the OR? Are FANTABULOUS. It's like SUPER RARE stuff that you only read in books. Surgical heaven!!!! The only downside to this is having to wake up at about 445 ( or maybe earlier to ensure I get to hospital by 515am. I finish work today at about 730pm. Bummer? It sure is, especially when ppl in other specialties start to say, "Oh. My day is shorter."
Anyhow. Indianapolis is pretty warm despite being told it can be really really cold. I think Halifax is definitely colder. I think I may be able to walk around in shorts soon. This AM was as warm at 7 degrees. No wind chill too. Checking the weather out in Halifax, I saw a -10 (-15 after wind chill). Brrrrrr...
Alright. That's more short update. No intelligent or deep-in-thought kinda post. Have to sign off now to write my mum a long awaited email.
The one thing I'm seriously SERIOUSLY in love with is the hospital. IT IS HUGE. And all the cases in the OR? Are FANTABULOUS. It's like SUPER RARE stuff that you only read in books. Surgical heaven!!!! The only downside to this is having to wake up at about 445 ( or maybe earlier to ensure I get to hospital by 515am. I finish work today at about 730pm. Bummer? It sure is, especially when ppl in other specialties start to say, "Oh. My day is shorter."
Anyhow. Indianapolis is pretty warm despite being told it can be really really cold. I think Halifax is definitely colder. I think I may be able to walk around in shorts soon. This AM was as warm at 7 degrees. No wind chill too. Checking the weather out in Halifax, I saw a -10 (-15 after wind chill). Brrrrrr...
Alright. That's more short update. No intelligent or deep-in-thought kinda post. Have to sign off now to write my mum a long awaited email.
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
tis the season
Tis the season where the land is white, and full of snow.
Yesterday was one of the few times playing with friends outside before I leave for the states. I know. It's not forever. But 2 months can be long and be bad when you are all by yourself. Anyhow. This isn't a sad blog. Just here to post up pictures for friends and family. Note how I survived subzero temperature in shorts. YEE HA!
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